Dedication or Stubborness . . .

My parents will celebrate 50 years of marriage in 21 days. I am so proud of them for making it to this milestone. As I type this my father has just had a quadruple bypass and is still in the hospital. He is doing great and will be out of the hospital in the next few days. Their road to this anniversary has not been easy, it has been filled with trials, tragedy, struggles. It has also been filled with love, family, fun. So how do some couples keep it together for so long and then there are the couples who don't make it. What quality do the couples who make it have? I have wondered that for years, as I have seen couples that I thought were "perfect" fall apart. Just recently in the news was a story of Al & Tipper Gore who are divorcing after 40 years. Really? How do you live with and love someone that long and then go your separate ways. My parents, as I look back at their marriage just since I have been able to observe, the qualities that I observe that keeps them together, dedication, loyalty, stubborness. I am not joking I think it takes a lot of stubborness to stick it out during the hard times. Both my parents are like rocks strengthwise, My mom has been so strong during daddy's health crisis, this is how she shows she loves him, she has not left his side in the week since he became ill. Daddy shows his concern for mom's safety and her comfort by wanting her to go home and rest but she is running the show right now. So I guess there are many qualities but as my parents get ready to celebrate a milestone that so many will not ever have a chance to get to, I hope and pray that hubby and I make it that far also, we are approaching our 15th anniversary so only 35 to go.

Random Thoughts

I am at loose ends today, I don't have to go back to the school and pick up my girls today, they are going home with a friend to spend the night. Don't quite know what to do with all that extra time! I am not really feeling all that great so I have stayed home today. My sweet hubby knows I don't like to drive in the rain and since I woke up with a headache, he drove our girls to school, I rode along but was very thankful I wasn't doing the driving. It was raining so hard and water was standing everywhere because we have had so much rain in the past 3 months that the ground just won't take anymore.

I have been feeling like I am at a crossroads in my life. I am looking into going back to school, I have been interested in nutrition for a while and now that I have been subbing and I am really enjoying it, I have been wondering about teaching, both would be very time consuming so I am praying and researching my options.

I have been reading some books on how to raise a Godly daughter and how to prevent her from being mean. I am learning a lot about how God uses even the bad situations in our lives to teach us and bring us closer to him. I feel such a heavy responsibility to raise my daughters up in a Godly way. God chose me to be their mama, he could have chosen anyone else but he chose me to be theirs and that is very humbling to me. Johnny and I have always known that God has a special purpose for both their lives and we want to do whatever it takes to help them find and fulfill that purpose. They both accepted the Lord into their hearts at 7 years old, and started telling others about him immediately, they are so bold, I have always been shy with others but they just want others to love Jesus as much as they do.

That is all for now, I need to go find something for this sore throat.

Character Building

My daughters go to a small private christian school that was started last year. This year the school started a sports program starting with a football team. We have a volleyball team, cross country team and now basketball. Our football team was plagued with injuries, some of our players had never even stepped on a football field-ever. This team lost every game and most of them were huge losses but to stand on the sidelines and feel the pride of our school for those players and the fact that no one really cared that we got beat but that no matter how battered and bruised our players were they kept playing. This is a reoccuring theme with our basketball team. Last night my daughters cheered for their first time-nervous and proud mama moment. Anyway I digress. Our basketball team was up against a team with a player who is 6 foot 5 and one who is 6 foot 9. Wow I think our talled player is 6 foot tall. Our players listened to their coaches and kept the score close. They have played this team before and they knew what they were up against, but they showed up, excited and ready to play. They played with heart and at the end of the game it was 145-108. I am proud that my daughters are able to attend these games and see what it is to lose and still hold your head high. Lesson to be learned - you can't always win but you can be gracious no matter what. Second lesson - Have fun.

First year sports programs are always gonna be rough, but I think and hope that these kids are better people for this. They have all been told they are building something for the future and they truly are- a legacy to be proud of. These players and staff have earned my respect for holding their heads high, Thank you for setting such a amazing example for kids who look up to you.

Our school mascot is the Warrior. My new definition of a warrior is someone may not win every fight or war but continues to fight no matter the odds. Go Warriors!!!

We are Family!!

Labor Day weekend is the time we hold our family reunion for my mom's side of the family. It is a lot of fun and we eat a lot, as a matter of fact we call it "Grazefest". I love this time so much, but I don't think I love it as much as my mom and her sisters and all of the great grandkids. I wish we could all live closer so the kids could be together more often but I guess that is what makes this all the more special. My girls start on the day we leave planning the schedule for the following year-I amazes me how much they love this.

I think my kids generation is starting to see the importance of family, something my generation moved away from as quickly as possible. I hope my girls always crave family and work to make it possible to be together.

Perserverance/Character Building

Last night we had the opportunity to take out girls to the first football game ever for the girls school, Skipstone Academy. We drove to Lagrange for this game, we wanted the girls to be able to remember they were there for the first game ever someday down the line.

Our team is small in numbers but we are from a small school so that is to be expected. Those boys truly had to feel like they were Facing the Giants last night, the other team was bigger in number, they were on their own turf, they had cheerleaders. We did have amazing fan turnout considering how far it was. We tried to let the guys know we were behind them, we hollered and screamed the whole game. The guys played their hearts out last night, I know we had atleast 3 injuries by halftime but they did give up, even though the score was 54-0 at that point. I asked my husband why they did not call the game at that point, he told me the guys would not want to do that. He told me that everybody has to start somewhere and most of the time it is not at the top. He was right, after halftime, the team never let the other team score, and they managed to score an amazing touchdown. We probably celebrated more over that first touchdown than the other team celebrated over all theirs. I am not putting the other team down by any means, they played an amazing game, we just wanted the guys to have a taste of it. After the game was over I was proud to see all of our guys with their heads held high, they have nothing to be ashamed of, they played to the best of their abilities and never gave up-these will become great men some day with great leadership abilities because they have seen the impossible situation and did not walk away. I am proud to say these are the role models for my children to watch everyday. I saw one of the guys shirts yesterday during the pep rally and it said "I can, I will, I am a Warrior" and they did last night! I would not have missed this experience for anything.

Job 23:10 "For He knoweth they way that I take: when he hath tried me, I shall come forth as gold."

This my favorite verse in the Bible, Job was tested beyond anything he himself could have stood but he knew that God had a plan, he was able to accept what happened somehow. This is how I want to be able to handle the curves that life throws at me, I know that God has my life planned and there is a reason for everything. I want to be a better person on the other end of whatever situation I encounter.

I don 't think it was any accident that one of our school colors is gold because the team came forth as gold last night.

I know I am babbling but the name of the blog is inner thoughts on the outside, this is how my brain works I start somewhere and my brain shoots off on tandem thoughts before returning to the original train of thought. Till the next random thought . . .

Wedding Anniversary

Today is my 14th wedding anniversary. I am so amazed that God has blessed me with this amazing man in my life. I am fortunate that my husband still loves and wants me. He truly is my best friend and other half.

A little about my husband, Johnny. My husband is a God-fearing Christian man. He also is gorgeous!! More importantly than that is what is on the inside. He is a rock, nothing moves him from his convictions, he amazes me. He has honor, this is a quality that is rare to find in today's world but seriously a long time ago he would have been a perfect knight. He is really funny but most people don't even know that about him. He is so smart, way smarter than most people would even give him credit for. Again I am blessed that God created this man and placed him in my life. I know he is not perfect but he is mine, and I am so glad that he is mine.

Mean Girls

I know that this is the name of a movie but currently I feel like there are more of the means girls around than nice girls. I wonder if I have done a disservice to my daughters by teaching them to always be nice even in the face someone being mean to them. I by no means think my daughters are perfect, I know they can be mean to each other, but somehow they are never mean to other children. It breaks my heart when we come home from somewhere and hear from them that someone was rude or just plain mean to them. The thing is I know most of the parents that are involved and they do not act like that so where does this come from. Would they be appalled if they knew their daughters acted like this? I have heard it be said that little girls are mean because all girls grow up to be witches with a capital B.

I don't know what I should do. I am tired of my amazing daughters having their feelings hurt whereever we go. I sometimes think that some of the crap that they take will shape them for later in life, but I want them to live life to the fullest and not feel pushed to the back and like they are not important. Maybe one day other girls will realize it is better to build others up instead tearing them down. Until then I will keep holding my daughters when they get their feelings hurt and hoping and praying that no permanent damage done to their spirit.